It’s after midnight, the kids are in bed, and I was raised watching horror movies. So, of course, I picked a horror movie to watch, while I should be doing a million other, far more productive, things — Children of the Corn.
While the psychotic children were going on about “He who walks behind the rows”, I started laughing to myself, reminded of the first time I saw this movie, as a child.
I remember spending the ENTIRE film thinking, Where is this rose everyone keeps talking about? What does corn have to do with roses? Roses don’t even grow on corn. What’s wrong with Stephen King? I’m a kid and even I know that roses don’t grow in corn fields. I don’t get it…
I probably should have been scared. It’s a horror movie, after all. Kids who run about killing their parents should have shocked, or at least upset, me. But, I just kept obsessing over that friggin’ rose — looking everywhere for it, waiting for some monster, hiding behind a rose, to pop up out of nowhere. He never appeared. There was no rose.
At the end of the film, I turned to my father. I was very upset. It was like false advertising! How was anyone supposed to understand this movie, when the villain didn’t have anything to do with the supposed rose everyone kept referencing?!
So, I yelled, “WHAT ROSE? ALL I SAW WAS CORN!”
My father cracked up, after a moment of confusion, when he realized that I was talking about the flower. “The rows of corn,” he said.
“Corn rows — rows of corn in the field. That’s what they were talking about.”
“OOOOOHHHH – ‘He who walks behind the ROWS’…”
Had I read the book, rather than just watching the movie version, I would have understood. But, hearing it, without seeing the spelling, my child’s mind immediately jumped to exactly what it sounded like. They kept talking about a rose that didn’t exist… stupid rose…